well, shit.

I was planning to post about Christmas. I would have talked about my boyfriend's work Christmas party, and how it was so different from mine (his employer is a huge electronics supplier; mine is a nonprofit). I would have talked about our little Christmas celebration, a day of watching movies in our apartment and being too hungover to function.

But I'm not going to do that anymore. I'm too pissed off. I'm pissed and depressed. I'm in that mood where everything makes me cry, and I want to hit someone.

There I am, breaking down in inappropriate places! (this week's edition: the student union!)

Seriously though. Since Damien and I moved back to Norman this summer, I feel like it's been one disaster after another. And we're broke kids who don't have rich parents to bail us out, so we're basically just fucked.

We're having truck problems again. Damien has this 1999 red Ford Ranger. We call her Roxanne. She is awesome and I love her. I love driving her around, listening to music, smoking cigarettes, and just being a cute girl in a cute little truck. She got us all the way to Oklahoma from Wisconsin safely, and that is so great. But she's had her share of problems.

Lately, the left side of the truck has been emitting these awful noises that sound like everything is just going to fall apart at any moment. Seriously. I feared for my life today as I drove it to the auto shop.

Anyway, to wrap all this up, now the truck is in the shop. I'll be taking the bus to work, and probably walking home. Just like I will be for the next three days. Who knows how much it will cost to fix... and who knows if we can even afford it. We are seriously broke right now. And if it's more than a certain amount of money, it has to come out of my paycheck, which I was counting on to be able to buy Christmas presents for my family and have some spending money while I'm home.

I hate to whine. I know things could be worse. I know that, all things considered, I've got it pretty good. But, you know, I just want life to be calm and not so stressful all the time. It's like as soon as we take care of one catastrophe, another one is never too far behind.

I'm just tired of being so painfully aware of how much everything sucks.